Alone in a Crowd

Alone. 

Watching. Listening. Observing.

Surrounded by chattering and laughing.

Within my eyes a glint of admiration.

But a short distance separates us.

Knowing that if one step closer is made,

Quiet. Seriousness.

Perhaps a friendly spoken word or two,

But only because it's customary.

The response is cheerful, or at least polite,

Though made empty of satisfaction,

For the heart still longs.

For some reason, they respond to me differently,

Usually with good intentions.

It's perplexing.

So in the distance I remain,

Living vicariously through another.

Watching. Wishing. Dreaming.

Alone.

Commentary:

This particular poem is a sad one for many people. I'm not in this particular mood right now, but I've been remembering the times when this was a reality for me. I've often heard the statement "Alone in the crowd," and decided I would write down what that particularly means to me in terms that other people might understand. I would like to note also that this isn't always my automatic reaction every time I'm dealing with a crowd. It often involves where my mood inclinations for the day are, because if I'm in a darker mood, I'm more prone to this type of thinking. When I'm in a good mood, I'm usually happy or at least content wherever I am. I thought writing this kind of poem at the moment might be a good representation to everyone out there that I have my struggles like any human would.

A friendly gesture that reminded me I'm not alone despite how it might feel sometimes.